A man living in a deep, forgotten, maze-like alleyway told me this:
He spoke of a Polish curse, one that bends the laws of causality. He says that you will realize on your wedding day, soon before exchanging vows, that your wedding is actually just a scene from a movie being filmed. Cameras will be here and there, sound equipment. But, the movie is in fact a remake of a foreign movie. Actually, that movie never got finished due to certain 'difficulties' as this self proclaimed 'Alley Master' claims without further elaboration; so it's not really a remake, just a retooling of the same script. Anyway, keep up now, it gets weirder. You begin to realize that your husband is like some one-dimensional stereotypical movie character, the smarmy variety. As soon as you realize this, you will find yourself in an alley. The word 'axxonn' is written on the wall with an arrow pointing down a dark stairwell. Descending down that leads to another place and time, where you'll meet The Man in Green. His motivations won't be clear to you at first, but take the screwdriver and go through the nearest door. This leads to a fine house where your husband-to-be resides, but he has a family. He glowers at you and states that the screwdriver "will not fix the problem". His 'wife' looks scornfully at you as well and you find that you have been somehow stabbed by the screwdriver in the stomach. You black out and wake up in a movie theater, where you see yourself on screen stabbed with a screwdriver. That's when you realize that you've been sitting in your room all this time watching static on a TV right before your wedding. Thinking you had some sort of weird out of body experience, you get up to go to your wedding when, well, another You walks in and gives you a hug.
The Alley Master kind of mumbled off after that and soon fell into an alcohol induced sleep. I think.
Well, anyway, have a good wedding!