Gamer’s Gullet – Cheetos SWEETOS Review

Ghettos –

Transitioning from a cheese puff to a cinnamon sugar puff might seem like a natural evolution for America’s favorite processed cheetah endorsed snack but this is one poisonous puff that never should have been.

Limited time for Easter season

Limited time for Easter season

For a limited time only, Sweetos are cinnamon sugar puffs that are baked in tears and sorrow. Not quite sweet but not quite salty, these wisps are awkwardly stuck in the middle yielding a taste only Chester Cheetah’s mother could love. With a terrible after taste that gets stuck in your teeth from the first bite, it would easy to assume that Sweetos are going to be sweet, hence the name, but fall way short of the mark. The name Sweetos made me assume I was basically going to be getting Cinnamon Toast Crunch cereal in puff format; this is not the case. Instead, these airy snacks are clumsily bland and actually just plain terrible.

False advertising. Your taste buds will not be jumping. They will be puking.

False advertising. Your taste buds will not be jumping. They will be puking.

I am not sure what the puff shape is even supposed to be. Is it a pig snout? Is it supposed to Chester Cheetah’s paw? Are they prison bars? No one knows but the brown color indicates a cinnamon flavor that disappoints the eater with appalling taste and texture.

Don't put deez in your mouf!!!1!11

Don’t put deez in your mouf!!!1!11

Further, eating only a handful of these atrocious tufts will fulfill a beastly 16% of your daily fat intake. Not only are you punishing your taste buds by eating these, your entire body will hate you too. At least the pretty purple bag is something to look at. You don’t get to see Chester Cheetah wearing bunny ears every day either.

What are these shapes supposed to be?

What are these shapes supposed to be?

The original Cheetos, and all their cheesy crunchiness, are flavorful snacks that been scarfed during countless lunch hours, welcomingly left finger tips drenched in cheese dust, and is instantly recognizable thanks to an unforgettable mascot. While I give props to the Cheeto company for branching out to try something new, Sweetos are not the answer and will leave a bad taste in your mouth, literally. These things are abysmal and I am upset that I wasted $3 on these toxic crisps. I doubt even your dog would want them. Instead of Sweetos, I will be referring to these as Ghettos from now on.

Cheetos are not exactly known for being the most healthiest of snack anyway...

Cheetos are not exactly known for being the most healthiest of snack anyway…

 

Not As Good As: Chester Cheetah: Too Cool to Fool (SNES)
Chester Cheetah Should Fight: the Noid
Also Try: Chester Cheetah: Wild Wild Quest (Genesis)

 

By: Zachary Gasiorowski, Editor in Chief myGamer.com
Twitter: @ZackGaz

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3 comments

  1. Avatar of Dandapatra Dandapatra says:

    I’ve never heard of Sweetos, but I probably would have bought them if given the chance. Now I know I wont, though.

  2. Avatar of KiprasN KiprasN says:

    That’s definitely an interesting review on this website, fun to see something way different. Well what can I say, I haven’t tryed those yet, but after reading this I am lost. As much as I don’t want to feel that taste, I also wanna see if they’re really that horrible. Left me hanging here..

  3. Looks pretty unappetizing to me. Pretty abysmal to be honest. I think those shapes are supposed to be the ergonomic modular head rests you attach to your gaming recliner.

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